


Memento Mori: fragile innocence

by FlamboyantProblematic



Series: Memento Mori [2]
Category: Disco Elysium (Video Game)
Genre: Child Abuse, Child Neglect, Homophobia, M/M, Misogyny, Pre-Canon, Pre-Slash, Prequel, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-07
Updated: 2020-11-07
Packaged: 2021-03-09 06:07:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,582
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27429937
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FlamboyantProblematic/pseuds/FlamboyantProblematic
Summary: Set in the universe of Memento Mori; a young Glen suffers abuse at the hands of his alcoholic father. A short story that just expands on the preteen years of one messed up blonde and how one boy kept him from dying before the age of sixteen.
Relationships: Glen/Titus Hardie
Series: Memento Mori [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1788244
Comments: 3
Kudos: 4





	Memento Mori: fragile innocence

**Author's Note:**

> CW; extremely dark themes that include child abuse, violence, and rape. Read at your own risk.

The cheers of the crowd are wild in the dark space around you. They're clapping and hollering, and most importantly, they're calling your name. You need to make this shot for your team to win. The ball is set on the kicking tee. You see the crossbars manifest before your eyes in the sea of darkness with the invisible hoard of onlookers, eagerly awaiting your move.

Deep breath...

Kick.

The ball flies into the sky, ascending into orbit, the crowd screams, and then... crash.

You gasp. Your heart hammers in your chest at the sound of whatever boxes that were over your head crashing down onto the floor. You can't see what's inside them but you know it made a lot of noise.

Your lips tremble and you try to listen for any footsteps. The only light allowed inside here is whatever seeps into the slit under the door and from the cracks in the old wood. You peer your eyes into the small hole in the door... It's suddenly quiet. There's nothing outside, nothing but the mold on the wall in front of you and whatever little you could see from the living room chair.

You might just be alright after all.

Breathe. Your lungs demand air. You didn't even know you were holding your breath. Carefully, you take a step back away from the door and try to find a place for yourself in the small room you're kept in.

You have to stay quiet.

The wooden floor creaks making the hairs on the back of your neck stand up. Suddenly you realize as the burning bright light hits your face that the sound did not come from your steps. You put your hand up but it's already too late. When the wooden bat hits your small fragile frame, you knew you've already lost.

There's nothing left to do but curl up and pray that the pain will stop soon.

You don't want to cry. Crying only makes it angrier. But you can't help it. When the bat slams against your bones, it's impossible for you to keep it in. You whimper and you weep, it doesn't take pity on you. The bat doesn't stop swinging.

"What did I tell you about making noise while I'm listening to the game, boy?!"

"I'm sorry!" You try to reason with it. "Please, I'll be quiet!"

It doesn't stop, no matter how much you beg or plead.

"Please! Please, sir! I'll be good! I'll be good, I promise!"

There's a familiar taste in your mouth, the taste of iron, and crimson blood. Your sleeve is stained with a mix of red, wet with snot and saliva.

When the bat no longer satisfies the monster, it takes to kicking you and stomping on you like a bug.

You want to stop crying but you're in so much pain. It yells at you for crying.

"Wipe those tears, you little fucking sissy. Men don't cry. I did not raise a fucking f*ggot, do you hear me?!" Take it like a man, it wants you to just take it like a man. But you can't. You can't stop yourself from howling as its foot digs itself into your stomach. The pressure makes you want to throw up and you almost wet yourself.

It doesn't stop until beating you is no longer amusing to it... at least for now, and then it leaves you again, locked inside the dark room, lying in a pool of your own spit, tears, and blood.

You were bad. You don't get food that day.

* * *

"You have to stop gettin' into fights with the other kids, Glenny."

You hear the sound of tape becoming undone and hiss as the broader boy in front of you sticks a bandaid over a cut on your cheek. Another one sits on your nose and another on your forehead. Your face is covered in bandaids and still, they couldn't cover the horrors of what you have to live with.

Your lips are puffy, your eyes are swollen, your skin is blue and purple all over... You can't cover it all up.

"I don't want you to have to patch you up every week now. What if you died? I don't want that to happen to you. I don't want you to die like the other kids."

Death sounds like mercy.

"They asked for it!" You lie. "But I beat their butts real good, Titus." Another lie.

Titus Hardie laughs softly. It makes the pain stop for a minute. He has really pretty eyes when he's happy, you think. You want him to always be happy. "I bet you did."

"Uh-huh!" You nod. "I'm really strong, you know!"

His smile widens. You can't help but smile now too, even though it hurts. "You sure are, buddy. But numbers are pretty strong too. It don't matter how strong you are if they outnumber you."

"Okay. Do you wanna go play now?" You're eager to play with him. You don't get to play with others often. If you come home late, daddy gets very angry. You only managed to sneak out today because it was asleep after getting wasted last night.

You have to be back home before it wakes up. You don't want to go back into the dark room.

"You sure you can walk? Your leg looks pretty bad."

"I can!" You can't, not really. Your legs are swollen and applying any pressure on them hurts a lot.

"We can go get some sweets and then skip stones." He knows you're in no shape to play ball. You're disappointed but you nod anyway. At least you still get to spend time with him.

The lake is calm and beautiful. The wind is a gentle breeze against your skin, caressing your cheek like a mother's touch. At least, that's how you imagine it would be. It plays with your dirty blonde hair and moves it back behind your ear. You wish you could stay here forever.

You sit on top of a giant rock and watch the lake extend into the horizon. There are trees on either side of the lake where wildlife usually resides. Titus and his dad come here to hunt or fish. Their old family boat is tied to the jetty not too far away from you.

"My dad said when I grow up, I can have this boat. When it's mine, you and I can go across the lake!" There's nothing on the other side of the lake except more trees, or maybe just an open wide area full of nothing but snow. Martinaise has a lot of those. You're excited about it anyway.

"That would be really cool."

You munch down on the warm round bun in your small hands, the taste of the chocolate filling immediately fills your mouth, it's heavenly. Not anything like what the old man gives you at home if he even does. Most of the time you're the one that has to hunt for your own food and the cabinets at home are mostly used to store even more beer. It's all that fiend ever does. Drink, drink, drink.

Sometimes it gets mad at you if you drink from its beer, other times it'll force you to gulp down bottle after bottle... Or it's going to rip your eyes out and slit your throat with the glass. You don't mind the drinking but you hate the dizziness you feel after and having to throw up everything in your stomach if there's even anything there.

Beer is a man's drink, it told you. You're going to have to get used to it.

You snap out of your thoughts when you hear Titus shuffling his hands in a group of small stones. He grabs one and smoothes it with his thumb. You watch him throw it as you continue to enjoy the little treat in your hand.

It flies far, you think it might have even reached half of the lake (it didn't but it seems like it did to you. Maybe you just imagined it.) When It hits the surface of the water it makes a bloop sound and then quickly disappears beneath, never be seen again.

You quickly finish up the rest of your bread so you can join him. The two of you end up having a contest to see who can throw the pebbles further.

When the sun sets, you know it's time to go home and say goodbye. You don't want to... But if you're good, you'll be able to see Titus more often!

The two of you chat about sports on your way home and before he leaves, he wraps his arms around you and pulls you into his firm embrace.

He's so warm. He smells nice too. It feels good to be held like this. You don't want to let him go.

Before him, you never even knew what handshakes were let alone hugs. Daddy never hugs you. He doesn't play with you. He's always angry.

"Stay out of trouble, alright?"

"Okay."

He pulls back. You never knew Martinaise could be this cold.

"I'll see you later, Glenny."

Don't leave. You don't want him to leave yet. But he can't stay... If daddy saw him, he'll be really angry and you don't want daddy to beat Titus. You'll see him again tomorrow, you just have to make it till then.

* * *

You can't sleep. Daddy has one of his "whores" in his room. That's what he calls them. She's screaming and daddy is screaming. He's calling her a bitch, a cock sucking slut. You think he beats her his "whores" too because they're always crying when they leave and there's blood. Blood on their face and down their bodies.

He makes you watch sometimes. He says that fucking women makes a man, women are made to serve and please men. They cook and they clean and they give men children. That's all that they're good for.

The woman is crying while she sucks on his cock. He slaps her when she doesn't suck hard enough and beats her even more while he fucks her just for the hell of it.

Men are superior, they're stronger than women, he tells you. Women are just good for sex.

When you got older, he let you touch them and he would beat you if you didn't. The woman's skin is soft. It's more delicate than your own, lighter, more beautiful. You hear her weeping as you move your hand up her chest to her breasts. You don't want to do this.

You bring your hand up to her face and stroke her tear stained cheek. It seems to calm her down a bit. But the peace doesn't last for long because you're pulled away from her, and it doesn't take long for her to start screaming again as you watch your father break her.

You tried to stop him once when you were thirteen. When you woke up, there was nothing but the cum and bloodstained sheets. Your father was just sitting casually in the living room drinking, as though he had done nothing.

One night he had one of his "whores" touch you. She stroked and sucked your dick but you were too repulsed to feel anything. He wanted you to fuck her. Become a man right in front of him.

The woman was too broken to protest, she simply gave herself to you hoping everything would be over soon. She'll take her money and live a while longer.

When you look at her fragile frame, you notice the blood coming from her vagina. You can't--- you don't want to hurt her even more.

Your body doesn't respond. A part of you, a sick and twisted part of you feels some kind of thrill from the thought of power and dominating this helpless woman, and beating her like daddy does, beating her like you beat the other kids. You like feeling strong. But... You can't. You're not like your father. You don't want to be the same monster.

"You're a f*ggot, a cock sucking f*ggot! You're no different than those whores, huh? I should be fucking you instead then."

You feel fear greater than mount Olympus at those words.

"I should slice your dick off and cut open a cunt to fuck. You don't deserve a dick," The beast grabs a fist full of your hair and shoves your face against his disgusting stained boxers. The smell is putrid. "You're no man, just a fucking pussy-boy."

Mercy, he lets you go...

But you'll never recover.

* * *

The water splashes as Titus jumps in. The lake is cold but you're thankful for that. It helps you numb the pain in your body, all the bruises, and gashes that have yet to heal.

The two of you go for a swim and dance around one another in the water. You dive down and pull each other to the bottom. You playfight and laugh in bubbles that burst when they reach the surface.

You haven't felt this alive in a long time.

The two of you race back to shore and wrestle some more, sand and mud getting mixed in your hair. His knuckles dig into the crown of your head and he rubs, the sand sticks to you as you roll on the ground until you become breathless.

Even though he's dripping wet, Titus's body still feels incredibly warm, you're almost tempted to run your hand down his well-toned chest.

You watch him breathe, his eyes are lands larger than life. You could get lost traveling them. His breath is hot against your skin. Your lips are close.

Why do you feel the need to erase the remaining distance between you?

He presses his forehead against yours, his rabid breathing slowly coming down. Your hand finds its way to the side of his face, he smiles and mirrors your movement.

Your heart thunders inside your chest, fluttering like a butterfly.

His body... You crave to draw his outline with the tip of your fingers and memorize every curve and line and trace every scar.

He's more beautiful than any woman you've ever seen and mightier than all of Rome's men.

When he laughs, it's music to your ears. There's no greater sound.

You've never experienced such emotions before and yet it feels so easy. Like this is how it's meant to be. How its always meant to be.

You could close your eyes and just... Stay here with him. You can be happy.

There's a warmth in your chest that grips your heart and makes your ribcage feel tight. It's not unpleasant, it simply is. You're unsure of what to call this feeling but it's wonderful.

If only things can be this good all the time.

...  
...  
...  
...  
...  
...

This is what your father meant, isn't it?

A simple thought, a singular thought has demolished everything else in your mind. The hand gripping your heart through your ribcage suddenly squeezes. Peace and tranquility turn into panic and fear.

A thousand thoughts now inhabit your mind, all fighting for dominance as your heart pounds, pumping the rest of your toxic fears into your bloodstream. Your eyes snap open and as you stare at Titus, his eyes closed and a look of serenity on his face, one thought becomes prevalent in your mind...

One thought and one thought alone, but it shatters all of your existence...

 _ **He**_ was right, wasn't he?


End file.
